Friday, March 9, 2007
At Lily's, Gwen and Maddie narrowly avoided being caught by Jade. Jade was puzzled by her open computer and wondered if Natalie or Faith had logged on. Our larcenous ladies exited stage left and Gwen was certain Jade "doesn't have anything to hide." Maddie tried to keep her pal calm and escorted her home. Of course, the minute Maddie left, Gwen was starring in a remake of every classic suspense film ever. While she jumped at shadows, Maddie took the shaky camerawork to Casey at Chez Hughes. For obvious reasons, she wasn't quite into watching a classic thriller. Gwen was hearing whispers of her name, and Jade was having whispers of suspicion. In a series of cuts, Maddie acted weird on her impromptu movie date and Gwen had problems swallowing her steak dinner. Then Maddie got all twigged and Casey apologized for making her watch such close-to-home material. The whispers and Blair Witch camerawork continued as Maddie made excuses to Casey and Gwen tossed and turned. A nod to Poe's "The Telltale Heart" was next as Gwen heard Adam's thump-thump and awoke screaming. She screamed even louder when she imagined Adam himself! Will called in the middle of Gwen's freakout and she assured him she was fine. "I'm just scared without you here," she told him, laughing off her willies. (No pun intended.) Then, the line cut off... At the dark Hughes house, Maddie told Casey to stop blaming himself for Adam going AWOL. "I want us to be honest with each other," Casey told her, tripping her guilt. Meanwhile, Gwen called Adam's name, saw footprints and found the bloody stick Maddie had used to wallop Adam — in her bed. Unbalanced Gwen hopped in her car to go get Maddie. Naturally ghostAdam popped up to critique her pulling out of the driveway.

Casey praised Maddie's wonderfulness and mused about how Margo often worried about her boys being "dead in a ditch somewhere." The poor choice of words made Maddie fled back to Chez Munson Junior with Gwen. En route, they got pulled over for Gwen's crazy driving and Maddie made up some wacky excuse (as she does) that got them off with a mere warning. When the gals finally made it back to the Munson Manse, the house was totally clean. Maddie grimly compared Adam's head games to her rapist, Lewis, and then grabbed a baseball bat. Back at the Snyders, scared Natalie curled up in bed with Jade. Casey left Maddie a worried voicemail and Will...well, he decided to head back to Oakdale ASAP! Meanwhile, Gwen ran outside and yelled, "Come on, show your stupid bloody face!" at Adam in a very I Know What You Did Last Summer way. Maddie then made her some tea (hopefully to soothe her vocal cords) and told her that she's tired of being a victim. Finally, the phone rang. It was a voice from the grave: "It's Adam. Meet me in the woods. You know where."

Thursday, March 8, 2007
At Al's, Paul ran into waitress Meg. Awkward.... She told him to stay and eat instead of running off. He got in a cute dig at her scoring "another job in uniform" before wishing her better luck with Craig than Rosanna and Jennifer. They actually found some flirty common ground but Casey interrupted with a food order. At the Lakeview, Em was flirting with a john and her mom interrupted! (How often does that happen?) Susan wondered what Em was up to. Emily denied any hanky-panky and then boggled as Susan told her Alison broke up with Aaron and moved to Los Angeles! Later, big bro Holden asked Meg for the 411 on the sudden thaw with Paul, and told her Mama was coming home. (Gulp!) "She's usually right behind God in knowing everything!" Meg panicked, believing Emma would be disappointed in her waitressing-and-Wagon-Wheel turn. Aw! Outside, Paul updated Holden about his visions and Holden asked Paul to stay away from his family.

Lily shot a commercial for Valley's Best with adorable Ethan at the farm and Faith fled before she could get roped in. Lucinda found Faith outside and then stormed in to interrupt the shoot. Lily and Lucinda went to the porch to argue as poor Ethan bawled. Lucinda chided Lily for her "end run" around Lucinda's authority at Worldwide. Lily asserted her position before going back in. Holden told Luce to respect said position and Lucinda pointed out that she couldn't "have a fiasco." Holden confided Faith's fiasco to his mom-in-law and asked her to have some extra, er, faith in her daughter. Inside, the Valley's Best moms gushed about going on OAKDALE NOW and brainstormed. Lucinda was now cautiously supportive and told Lily she's planning to go see Sierra. "Use this time wisely," she advised. Lily used the time to pop a pill while holding her baby. (Gasp!) Meanwhile, the soccer moms returned with a new bear for Ethan — exactly like the old one that Holden destroyed.

Dallas and Margo pondered Gwen's odd behavior as Casey came into the OPD. Out in the woods, our industrious gravediggers freaked out about Adam's missing corpse. Naturally, Maddie blamed Jade. (Jade caused global warming, too.) "It's wrong! It's been wrong since the beginning!" Gwen cried. Back at the station, Margo told Casey Adam's "in bigger trouble," and went to investigate. Maddie disabused frazzled Gwen of the notion of confessing all to Margo and Will. Of course, Margo was waiting for them at Chez Munson Junior! Maddie made up some lame excuse about botany class and samples to explain their dirty chic look, but Margo didn't buy it. She asked about Adam attacking Gwen. "No! We're not talking about rape here!" Gwen assured. Empathetic Margo just wanted to help but Gwen stuck to her guns. Guilt-ridden, she wanted to spill all, but Maddie again pointed the finger at Jade. Margo returned to the OPD to update Dallas and Casey, who were enjoying Al's takeout. Dallas let slip that he'd found Maddie at the morgue a few days before. And where was she headed next? Straight to Jade's computer. Jade's password? "Will." Naturally, Jade was right outside the door....

Wednesday, March 7, 2007
At Al's, Jack and Katie were still being flirty. "If he can survive losing you, he can survive anything," Jack said of Henry and Vienna. But would Katie survive pouty Parker and jolly J.J. showing up? She ambitiously offered to watch them while Jack ran to the station. "It'll be fun!" she enthused. The boys were a handful (to say the least!) until she revealed, "I stopped a hockey puck with my face." This totally won her points! They were playing hockey outside Al's by the time Jack returned. Of course, Katie was terrible and the show pulled the ol' guy-helps-girl-get-her-position-right trick. Katie made the shot and she and Jack seemed closer than ever. (Eek!)

Emily called Cheri from the Lakeview looking for her lost shoe and thanking her for yesterday's quick getaway. That's when Dusty walked up. "Your clothes say a lot," he cryptically noted of her sexy outfit, wondering about her shoes to boot. (Who is he? Henry?) Nervous Em complimented his shirt in return. Then, he described the hooker party at the Avalon and got to the point: "How much does it cost to hold your hand?" Ouch. Emily was rattled but denied everything, thanked him for his support and kindness and then told him to butt out. Cheri then arrived and Em had to explain the whole Dusty thing — including the fact that she's not sleeping with the man (yet). At the OPD, Dusty asked Jack to talk to vice about Cheri and the Avalon. Cheri warned Emily about "a crusader, a man on a mission," and Emily brushed it off and staunchly outlined her terms.

Jade told Will she didn't know where Adam is and pointed the finger at Maddie and Gwen. Back at Chez Munson Junior, the murderous mavens were freaking out about Gwen's wedding ring magically appearing. Will dismissed Jade's accusations and then Barbara stalked in. "We need to leave town tonight!" she announced to Will. Meanwhile, Gwen and Maddie were doing a lot of yelling about who planted the ring. Prime suspect? Jade. At the OPD, Dallas was helping Margo open mail from angry citizens. "You're good at what you do," he assured her before Jade arrived to show Margo Adam's bouquet. Twigged Margo questioned Jade and got mighty suspicious about her son. Elsewhere, Maddie and Gwen decided to dig up Adam's grave just to make sure he's not 'soap dead.' Babs and Will caught them leaving. Maddie trumped up an excuse about nocturnal gardening. Then, Will and Barbara invited Gwen on a trip to D.C. for a ceremony honoring Hal. Cue more excuses. Back at the station, Jade told a shocked Margo that Adam assaulted Gwen. Elsewhere, Babs hugged Will and sighed, "Poor Hal. He must be rolling over in his grave." At the same moment, our nocturnal gardeners realized Adam's body was gone!

Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Dusty caught up with Emily at Al's, but not for the pancakes. Emily was in no mood to discuss her bruises, not even when Jack walked up and wondered about her new black and blue look. Emily claimed an "accident," and told Dusty to "leave it alone." But when she blew him off for a meeting with Cheri, Dusty swore to find out what was up. Then, Emily dropped by Cheri's suite and found Cheri throwing a party at which her attendance was mandatory. Despite not being into "group scenes," Em complied. One of the partygoers ...? You guessed it, Dusty! Lucky for Emily, she spotted him on his fact-finding mission. She made a quick getaway as Cheri distracted the Dustmeister.

Katie boggled at Henry and Vienna's canoodling. "Get your tongue out of his ear, you skank!" she cried. "We're lovers," Vienna overshared, calling Katie "jealous." After Henry sent Vienna off with a slap on the rear, Katie demanded the 411. "She just...got me," Henry sighed. Katie thought the whole thing was "a little weird," and tried to make it all about her own loneliness. Long-suffering Henry blasted her and then when Vienna brought her papers, he signed on the dotted line. Katie was crushed! Outside Al's, she got hit again by realizing Jack had made excuses to avoid getting a drink with her. Later, Henry and Vienna toasted, but Vienna knew Katie had bummed Henry out. "She'll get over it," V assured before they got all hot and heavy right there in the bar. Meanwhile, Jack sat down a tearful Katie and gave her the old "It's not you, it's me" speech. They decided to companionably tear into some fries.

At the farm, Luke and Holden touched on tractors and Faith's eating disorder before moving on to Luke skipping Spring Break festivities. Lovelorn Luke explained to Dad that he had no one to hook up with. "Did you talk to your parents about *your* sex life?" Luke chuckled as Holden tried to be all supportive about dating options in Oakdale. They drank some bottled water and it was positively the cutest conversation ever as Holden assured, "I'm your father, I want what's best for you," and Luke blushed a lot. Fortunately for the embarrassed teen, Jade called him away. Holden ended up confiding the "disaster" to an amused Meg. "He loves you, Holden," his sister grinned, telling him he's an "amazing father and a wonderful husband." Aw!

Gwen tried to explain her Adam issues to Will. Before she could get to the part about him being corpsified, Maddie explained that Adam attacked Gwen and ran off. "I woulda understood!" Will cried, apologizing for putting Gwen through hell. Furious, he was determined to track down Adam and make him pay. Maddie talked Gwen off the ledge for the millionth time and then Jade showed up. Moments later, Jade got a flower delivery from the dead man! Maddie didn't believe it for a second. She accused Jade of sending the bouquet to herself. Jade told Luke all about Maddie and Gwen's bizarre behavior and then Will found them. Maddie assured Gwen that Adam wasn't "calling 1-800-Daisies from the grave," and then the women found a package on Gwen's doorstep from an...AM. (Maybe it's AMC's Alicia Minshew?) Luke and Jade were appalled to hear the Adam-attacked-Gwen story and together with Will they wondered what Adam wanted. Back at the Munson Manse, Gwen opened the package and found...her missing wedding ring!

Monday, March 5, 2007
As Katie lurked, Jack blasted Brad for being so hard on Katie and Brad dished it right back, scoffing, "Boo frickin' hoo!" Brad accused Jack of transferring his Carly issues to another blonde. At the Lakeview, Vienna was feeling "transformed" and told Henry she wanted to give him every last penny she had. V pointed out that the prince couldn't sue her if all her money was in Henry's account. "I'm a hustler!" bewildered (but tempted) Henry reminded. Vienna claimed she saw Henry's pure soul. Back at WOAK, Katie rushed to Jack's defense and wondered why he kept sticking up for her. (Yeah, Jack, why is that?) Jack told Katie keeping Brad in line was in his own best interest. The conversation led to Katie innocently asking Jack out for a drink. Henry sputtered at Vienna's love declarations but quickly revised his stance after checking out her monetary assets. "I could get used to this," he mused, downing bubbly as Katie bounced in. Elsewhere, Brad and Jack were arguing again and Brad suggested he try some "mattress mambo" to get over Carly and loosen up. At the bar, Katie asked for Henry's plotting expertise...and then Vienna dropped into Henry's lap. Rattled Jack left Katie a voicemail taking a raincheck on the drink. Rattled for different reasons, Katie got to hear Vienna exclaim, "Henry and I are madly in love!"

In Old Town, Parker and Faith talked about why Faith was seeing a shrink. At the farm, Paul pulled Holden aside while Lily prepared to test some Valley's Best baby food on cutie Ethan. Faith's shrink dropped by and revealed Faith is getting worse. Faith spilled all her family and weight woes to Parker and Parker told her, "You look fine to me!" At Al's, Holden totally deserved points because he didn't laugh at Paul's explanation of his ESP or Paul's warnings about Ethan's teddy. Holden wondered if all of this was just a ploy to win over Nurse Meg. Paul told him to destroy Ethan's bear, just in case. The doc told Lily to remain vigilant with Faith and warned her to monitor herself as well. When Faith got home, she was busy chattering about health food. Not impressed, Lily searched her and found laxatives! "I'm tired of being fat!" Faith cried, wishing she looked like her friend Tea. Holden burst in on the argument and told Faith, "I love you just the way you are." Back at Al's, Parker asked Paul about girls. Not needing ESP for this one, Paul assured him that this particular girl was "way into you." Faith spilled Lily's pill habit, said her mother was the sick one and bolted upstairs. Overwhelmed Lily had to rush to a meeting and chugged some pills and wine on her way out the door.

At Crash, harried Maddie and Gwen whispered about Adam calling Jade. Will overheard. Naturally, the girls made excuses. Gwen didn't even want to experience ye olde college tradition of Spring Break! "You look like someone died," Will said bluntly. As if that didn't make Gwen jumpy enough, Maddie accidentally played Gwen's demo with Adam's voice on it! Will shooed Maddie away so he could chat with his wigged-out wife alone. "What the hell is going on?" he demanded. "Did you sleep with my brother?" Poor Will was so confused and so barking up the wrong tree. "Okay, okay, I'll tell you!" Gwen cried.

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