Thursday, April 14, 2005
Sam reviewed Spike's record — again — and rehashed to Ivy his hatred for the seedy club owner. Sam instructed Ivy to check on Jessica while he reviewed a second background check on Spike that arrived at the house. Over the phone, Ivy tried appealing to Jessica's sense of reason but she rebuffed Ivy's pleas to come home. Instead, she and Spike and enjoyed some randy pillowtalk in his backroom bed at the club. After sex Jessica was disappointed that Spike was not into kisses and cuddles. As soon as he gave Jessica the boot, Spike hit the mattress with a new girl without even changing the sheets (Ew!). Jessica successfully snuck back into her house, but was confronted by Ivy, who demanded some respect and consideration. During their tete-a-tete Ivy was horrified to see Jessica's "spike" tattoo. When Ivy suggested that Spike was using Jessica, Jessica bitch-slapped Ivy and threw her out of her room. When Jessica spied her father leaving the house to go back to the police station, she took the cigarette lighter she swiped from Spike and began to intentionally burn her arm with it.

Simone confronted Whitney about giving her nephew up for adoption, and expressed her disappointment with her older sister. Separately, Eve and Julian, and Liz and TC geared up to adopt Whitney's baby. Eve scared herself with the thought that TC and Liz might try to adopt the baby as well. As Julian assuaged her concerns, TC and Liz arrived at the adoption agency to get the ball rolling. But they were horrified to learn from the agency officials that someone else had already started the application process to adopt the baby. Privately the officials marveled at a third application for Whitney baby that arrived by messenger, and commented on how difficult a process it's going to be to decide which interested party should be granted the adoption.

At the Crane Compound, Theresa rehashed her appeal to Ethan, while Gwen informed Theresa that she and Ethan would be raising Ashley themselves. When Katherine tried to intercede Theresa told her off and accused her of being a hypocrite. Gwen forced the issue but Ethan insisted their No. 1 priority at the moment had to be escaping from the compound. Fox pulled Theresa aside and suggested she prepare for a custody battle against Gwen and Ethan. But Ethan stepped up and declared that there would be no custody battle — provided Theresa drops her criminal charges against Gwen, and insisted that all sides agree to peace before they return to Harmony. Privately, Fox tried to give Theresa a reality check when she insisted to him that things were STILL not over between her and Ethan — especially if she sends Gwen to prison for all of her criminal acts. On the plane leaving the compound, Katherine confided to Gwen that she didn't want to return to Harmony and be a third wheel for Martin and Pilar. But Ethan convinced her to at least take the flight off the island in case she changes her mind by the time they reach Harmony.

Thursday, April 14, 2005
As Sam was talking to Ivy on the phone from Spike's new club, threatening once again "to bring him down," a rebellious Jessica was on the other line with Spike, informing him that she's interested in his "indecent proposal" after all. Ivy tried to get Jessica to stay put, but Jessica slapped Ivy down, and renewed her threat to have Sam bring Grace home before storming out of the house to see Spike. At the club, Sam gave Spike some parting threats before proceeding home. There, he vented his continued rage about Spike to Ivy, and decided he would check in on Jessica. A nervous Ivy narrowly convinced Sam to let Jessica "sleep." When Jessica returned to the club, Spike led her to a bed in his back room, and the two began to make out. Spike amorously admired Jessica's "Spike" tattoo. As Spike began to kick it up a notch sexually, Jessica quickly found herself in over her head — with no way out.

Mrs. Wallace taunted Beth that the end was near for her, as they anxiously awaited the DNA results to come back. In desperation, Beth started surfing the net looking for a place to buy phony passports, and vowed that Sheridan would die before she, Marty and Mrs. Wallace made their great escape. At the playground, Sheridan insisted to Luis that Marty is her son, and Luis pondered the implications of that (i.e. Beth must then be responsible for Sheridan's kidnapping, etc). Luis and Sheridan debated the possibility that Sheridan's hunches about Beth may be correct. Luis continued to defend Beth, based on his past history with her, while Sheridan remain committed to her instincts and hazy recollections.

Before making their escape from the Crane Compound, Gwen demanded that Ethan make a choice between her and Theresa, once and for all. Theresa made a teary, doe-eyed appeal to Ethan to choose her. After some very tense pauses and hesitations, Ethan proclaimed that he needed to honor his solemn vows to God, and so he declared that he would remain with Gwen. Theresa did her damnedest to tug at Ethan’s heartstrings, begging him to reconsider. But Ethan remained steadfast, and openly renewed his commitment to Gwen and their marriage — leaving both women in a state of shock, as Fox and Katherine looked on...

Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Ivy and Sam's romantic evening at home together went bust when one of Sam's officers delivered Spike's rap sheet and mug shot. Sam became enraged at Spike's long criminal record. Making a comparison between Spike and Alistair re: both men's blatant disregard for the law, Sam vowed to make Spike's life a "a living hell" and "bring him down." Little did Sam know that across town his daughter Jessica was not at the movies with big sis Kay — as he'd been told by Ivy — but was getting drunk and high at Spike's newly-opened club. There, Spike put the moves on Jessica, who politely told him he was way too old and suggested that they just be friends — but not before he planted a big wet one on her lips. As Jessica returned home, Sam got a call from his men, tipping him off that Spike was back in business. Sam abandoned Ivy to go lean on Spike. Alone together, bratty Jessica blackmailed Ivy into getting some of her fine jewelry to sell for cash.

Beth made a final stand against having Marty tested, but buckled under Luis' pressure and relented.The poor mute DNA technie finally got a name ("Mr. Bateman"), and a line of dialogue (he commented on how the house smells of stale gin). After Bateman completed his sampling of Marty and Beth's DNA, Beth retreated into panic mode, as she and Mrs. Wallace began to count the hours until the test results hit the fan.

At the Crane Compound, Ethan admitted to Fox that the more he thought about which woman he wants to be with, the harder his decision was getting. The two somehow managed to find even more time to ponder Ethan's love life as they eluded Alistair's entire security force. Meanwhile, Gwen straddled Theresa on the floor in another room of the compound, choking the life out of her, until Theresa defensively kicked Gwen off.. After Gwen smashed Theresa in the head with a vase, Theresa got in a few good licks of her own and KO'd Gwen. That sent Katherine shrieking that "Theresa killed Gwen." Poor Katherine remained convinced of G's demise until Fox and Ethan arrived on the scene and Ethan yelled into Gwen's ear enough times for her to come to. As Gwen began to get up off the floor her eyes framed a lovely three-shot of Ethan, Theresa and the baby. Gwen instructed Ethan to go be with Theresa in a tone of bitter resignation.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Tabitha proved that for a 300-year-old witch, the ol' girl still got game: She managed to successfully incite a virtual free-for-all between feuding couples TC and Liz and Julian and Eve, over Whitney's decision put her baby up for adoption. TC and Liz accused Julian and Eve of encouraging Whitney to go ahead with the "dirty deed," with TC indicting Eve for "destroying Whitney's belief in family by her own bad example." When Julian basically told TC to close his trap, the fists went flying and the two men engaged in fistfight No. 347,156. Dainty Eve miraculously managed to break up the brawl without a single broken nail (natch), and informed her hot-headed ex that she tried to talk Whit out of it. TC was stunned when Whitney corroborated her mother's account — but still blamed Eve for poisoning their daughter's mind. When things simmered down, Julian pulled Tabitha aside and pleaded to be allowed a bigger part in Endora's life. But Tabby would have none of it from Jules, and sent him on his way — but not before her angry "friends in the basement" rattled the house and gave everyone a good scare. TC cooled off with a walk along the docks with Liz, who conjured up the idea of them adopting Whitney's baby. TC couldn't be happier with the thought of raising his own grandchild. Unfortunately, there are only so many original ideas to go around (especially in a small town like Harmony!) so not surprisingly, Julian came up with the same brainstorm for himself and Eve as well. Meanwhile, Tabitha wheeled out her bowl of magic rain water to spy on everyone's conversations. When she asked the bowl to reveal who will win this impending adoption imbroglio, Tabby was "bowled" over by the outcome.

Over at The Wallace (nut)house, Sheridan and Luis showed up with a DNA techie prepared to test Marty "once and for all!" Mrs. Wallace looked on in horror as her dear Bethy got boxed into a corner. When Beth's tap dance routine fizzled, she played the nutcase card on Sheridan in desperation. But that backfired, as her hostility toward Sheridan only drew Luis's suspicion. He openly questioned whether Beth had something to hide. Meanwhile, the poor, mute DNA tech got turned into a tennis ball, as he kept getting conflicting commands from Beth and Sheridan to "leave" and "stay," respectively. In exasperation, Luis finally put his foot down and demanded some cooperation from Beth, while all the excitement prompted Mrs. Wallace to call for a diaper change.

At the Crane Compound, Fox and Ethan overpowered one set of Crane security guards only to be recaptured by another set. This overpowering/recapturing cycle got repeated a number of times, in between which Fox grilled Ethan about which woman he'd choose if and "Gwen" they make it off the island alive. In another part of the Compound, Theresa's happy reunion with her baby, Jane, was cut short when Gwen stumbled into the room to reclaim "Ashley" for herself. Horrified at her memory of Gwen's deadly declaration to kill Theresa "if she laid eyes on her," Katherine intervened to prevent any bloodshed. For her part, Gwen did her best to quell the violent "inner voices" in her head, but they were overrun with blind rage when Theresa tried to leave the room with her baby. Gwen grabbed a pair of scissors but Katherine intervened, wrested them from Gwen's hands, and pleaded for peace. As Fox and Ethan were undergoing their repeating escape/recapture cycle, Gwen, Theresa and Katherine underwent a Gwen-snaps/Katherine-intervenes-and-saves-Theresa cycle of their own, which culminated in the start of a knock-down, drag-out catfight between G and T as a defeated Katherine looked on in horror (bet Peyton Place seems a pretty tame community by comparison).

Monday, April 11, 2005
Move over MacGyver! Ethan and Theresa broke into the Crane Compound using his laser pointer. Ethan kissed Theresa to avoid detection by the Crane guards. Theresa told Ethan that she loves him, while he stage-whispered just out of her earshot that he loves her too. Inside the Compound, Theresa reunited with Jane....

Katherine urged Gwen to make a decision about what she'd do if she ever escaped from the Crane Compound. Gwen realized she couldn't submit "Ashley" to a life on the run and would need to return to Harmony...but she would not hand the child over to Theresa without a fight. Then Gwen told Katherine (Twice! Ominous foreshadowing alert) that she would kill Theresa if she saw her with "Ashley," right before walking in on Theresa with the baby....

Fox faked a coughing fit to escape the room where he was being held captive. He knocked out a man who he believed to be a guard...but it was really his brother Ethan. Fortunately Ethan quickly regained consciousness, and the men took down two other guards before being held at gunpoint by a third....

Beth destroyed the clown outfit that she wore when she kidnapped Sheridan as Sheridan finally convinced Luis to request a paternity test from Beth. Beth was most surprised when they showed up on her doorstep — with a lab technician.