On October 8, Way of the COBRA Couples — a new book co-written by real-life husband-and-wife Sean Kanan (Deacon Sharpe, Bold and Beautiful) and Michele Kanan — is releasing. Soap Opera Digest checked in with the couple via email about their collaboration.
What is the genesis of undertaking this book together? “The idea for Way of the COBRA Couples came naturally as an extension of our personal journey as partners navigating both a loving marriage and a fast-paced Hollywood lifestyle. After the success of Way of the COBRA, we realized there was a gap in relationship advice books for couples who, like us, are striving to balance personal ambitions, family, and the realities of long-term commitment. We wanted to share our own experiences and create a guide that reflected our unique dynamic and the lessons we’ve learned along the way.”
What was your process for collaborating on the writing? Who was responsible for what? “We approached the writing like we approach our relationship: as equal partners, each bringing something unique to the table. Sean focused more on the voice, intensity, and mindset philosophy, pulling from his Way of the COBRA approach, while I [Michele] delved deeper into the interpersonal elements, blending humor, sensitivity, and real-world advice. We brainstormed the overall framework together, and then alternated between writing individually and refining together. Each section was a blend of our voices, which meant a lot of back-and-forth until we found the right balance.
Were there times that you clashed or disagreed creatively as you worked on the book? How did you navigate that if so? “Absolutely — creative tension is part of the process, especially when you’re both passionate about the message you want to convey. The trick was to step back and remind ourselves that we’re a team. Whenever a disagreement arose, we took a beat to listen to each other’s perspectives and decide whether the issue was about tone, content, or just a different way of expressing the same idea. This practice of respecting each other’s input actually strengthened our understanding of each other, both as partners and co-authors.”
Did you learn anything new about your own relationship in the process of writing this book? “Yes, we did. Writing this book made us reflect deeply on our relationship and the way we navigate challenges. It reinforced our belief in transparency, humor, and mutual respect. We realized that every time we hit a snag during the writing, we were mirroring how we handle conflict in real life. It was a reminder that our partnership isn’t just built on grand gestures but on the day-to-day practice of listening, compromising, and championing each other’s voices.”
Who would you say this book is for, meaning, who is its target audience? “This book is for couples who want to build a strong partnership without losing themselves in the process. It’s for people who are striving to become the best version of themselves and lift their partner up in the process. We envision this being helpful for anyone from newlyweds to long-time partners looking to rekindle their connection, as well as for individuals preparing for or transitioning into a serious relationship. It’s also for those curious to see how an unconventional Hollywood couple, with all its challenges, makes it work. It is also useful for someone looking for the perfect partner to help prepare them for a healthy relationship.”
How did you decide when it was done and no longer in need of any edits or tweaks? “There comes a point when you have to accept that perfection is the enemy of progress. We reached a moment where we felt we’d captured everything we wanted to say authentically and realized that more tweaking would just dilute the rawness and honesty we aimed for. We stepped back, read it again together, and decided that the book reflected who we were and the message we wanted to share. It was a gut feeling that told us it was time to let go and send it out into the world.”
Is there a part of the book that is closest to each of your hearts? “For Sean, the sections about mindset and resilience are closest to his heart because they mirror his own journey of personal growth and overcoming adversity. For [Michele], it’s the chapters on communication and intimacy — the parts that remind couples to nurture the emotional bond beneath the surface. But our shared favorite is the chapter that tells our story, where we really let our guard down and revealed what it took to turn two very different worlds into one cohesive partnership.”
Was there a part of the book that you found particularly challenging to write? “The chapter about navigating hardships and dealing with personal crises was tough because it required us to revisit some painful moments in our own relationship. It’s never easy to talk about the darker times, but we felt it was necessary to show that even the strongest couples aren’t immune to struggle. Those sections were the most emotionally draining but also the most rewarding to complete.”
What do you hope readers will take away from reading the book? “We hope readers walk away with a renewed sense of purpose and commitment to their relationships, and more importantly, to themselves. Our goal is to show couples that a successful relationship isn’t about being perfect; it’s about showing up every day with intention, love, and a willingness to grow together. We want people to feel empowered to write their own rule book, embrace their unique dynamic, and understand that the hard times are just as important as the good ones in shaping who they become as partners.”
Could you see a potential “part two” of the book?“Absolutely! We barely scratched the surface of certain topics, and there’s so much more to explore—especially as we continue to evolve as a couple. A potential follow-up could focus on deeper relationship stages or tackling the unique challenges faced by blended families, long-distance couples, or those working together professionally. We’d love to dive into even more specific advice and perhaps even share stories from other couples who’ve applied the COBRA Couples principles to their own relationships.”
Is there anything else that my questions haven’t spoken to that you want people to know about the project? “Yes, I’d say this book isn’t just for couples. It’s for anyone looking to understand what it means to be a strong, balanced individual in a partnership. We’ve framed it as a guide for couples, but a lot of it applies to people who want to build better relationships in all areas of their life—whether it’s with family, friends, or even business partners. And lastly, we want people to know that humor is a huge part of this project! Life’s too short to take everything seriously, and if you can’t laugh together — even when the going gets tough — what’s the point?”
